How to Help Someone Having a Panic Attack: What to Say

Updated 28 October 2026

What should you do when someone is having a panic attack?

1. Stay calm yourself

Your own calm matters more than finding the perfect words. Healthify, a clinically reviewed New Zealand health site, notes that staying calm yourself helps the other person gradually become calmer². Slow your own breathing and lower your voice.

2. Stay with them

Stay with the person until the attack passes, rather than leaving after a minute or two⁵. If they ask for space and aren't in danger, step back a little, but stay close enough to keep an eye on them³.

3. Make the space calmer

If you can, help them move somewhere quieter. Noise, bright light, and people staring or asking questions can make things worse, so keep it to one or two helpers and ask others to give you some room².

4. Reassure them, simply

Tell them you're there, that they're safe, and that this will pass. Panic attacks are frightening but not dangerous, and most last between 5 and 20 minutes¹. You don't need to explain or fix anything. A few words, repeated calmly, are enough.

5. Ask what they need

If they've had panic attacks before, they may know what helps: some people want to talk, others want quiet, a glass of water, or to step outside. Ask, and accept a short answer or none at all³.

How do you help someone breathe during a panic attack?

Breathe slowly and deeply alongside them, and invite them to follow your pace. Counting out loud, or slowly raising and lowering your arm to show the rhythm, can help². Keep it gentle and don't insist: if they don't want to follow a breathing exercise mid-attack, pushing one can backfire³. Don't use a paper bag; breathing into one doesn't help and can be dangerous².

Once the worst has passed, a grounding exercise can help them come back to the room. Talk them through 5-4-3-2-1: five things they can see, four they can feel, three they can hear, two they can smell, and one they can taste². There are more ideas in this list of grounding techniques.

What should you say to someone having a panic attack?

Short, calm phrases work best. For example:

• "I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."
• "You're safe. This will pass."
• "Breathe with me. In, and slowly out."
• "What would help right now?"
• "That sounds really hard. I'm sorry it's happening."

Acknowledging what they're going through can help them feel less alone³. Light, neutral conversation can also be a welcome distraction, as long as it doesn't put them under pressure to answer questions².

What should you avoid saying or doing?

• "Calm down" or "pull yourself together." These aren't helpful², and "just relax" or "what's wrong with you?" can leave someone feeling more isolated³.
• Comparing it to your own stress. Unless you get panic attacks yourself, it's hard to know exactly how one feels³.
• Asking "are you OK?" over and over, or repeating "don't worry"³.
• Assuming it's definitely panic. Panic attack symptoms can look like other medical problems, so don't assume that's what's happening².

When could it be something more serious?

Many panic attack symptoms, such as chest pain and shortness of breath, can also happen with other conditions¹. Call emergency services (999 in the UK, 911 in the US, 112 in the EU) if the person:

• has difficulty breathing or collapses²
• has chest pain that feels like squeezing and spreads to the arms or shoulders, or chest pressure lasting more than a minute or two³
• has symptoms lasting more than 20 minutes that are getting worse, not better³
• has never had a panic attack before, or you're simply not sure what's happening

In the UK, Rethink Mental Illness advises calling NHS 111 if a panic attack lasts longer than 20 minutes or comes with chest pain or an irregular heartbeat, and 999 in an emergency⁴.

What should you do after the panic attack?

Let them rest and move at their own pace. Ask what they need next and go along with it, even if it means cancelling plans³. If other people were around, you can offer to let them know everything is OK now².

Check in later that day or the next⁵. If panic attacks keep happening, gently encourage them to see a GP⁵. Panic disorder is treatable, and it's best to get help as soon as possible¹.

How can you prepare if someone you know gets panic attacks?

Not everyone experiences panic attacks in the same way³, so the most useful thing you can do is ask them, on a calm day, what helps and what doesn't. Some people like a hand on the shoulder, others don't want to be touched. Knowing their early signs, and agreeing on a simple plan, means neither of you has to think on the spot. It can also help to know where they'd want to go, and who they'd want called, if it happens when you're out.

Supporting someone through panic can be hard on you too. It's fine to take time to steady yourself afterwards.